Allowing vs Fixing

I'm a really good problem solver. It's why I love teaching you solutions and giving you tools. I think it's incredibly empowering to shift whatever’s going on in one's experience of reality.
 
What I'm not so great at, is sitting in the discomfort when things aren't clear. When I can't solve an issue. When an emotion or aspect of myself simply needs to be experienced, rather than moved through.
 
That’s tough for me. And I know I’m not alone in this.
 
It can be disconcerting to not figure out what’s going on energetically. Yet sometimes, the resolution can only come from getting out of the mind (the figuring out) and into the body, in the stillness with what is, rather than what we want it to be.
 
My inner child has been very vocal with her fears lately. And most days, I simply need to sit with and hold her. Do I want to fix the situation/her? Oh totally! However, I don’t want to train my subconscious that she (me) is broken when she simply needs to be held and supported. She needs to know I’m here, listening.
 
It’s not always the inner child being vocal, sometimes it’s an emotion such as sadness or anger that keeps taking your attention. Or your inner adolescent feeling rebellious.
 
So, if you've been in a similar situation lately or next time you are, put your hands over your heart. Breathe into your heart space for a moment. Settle your consciousness there.
 
Be present with yourself. Presence begins the healing process.
 
Keep breathing and hold space for yourself with kindness and compassion.
 
Then ask yourself what you most need. And don't expect that the answer will be to do something. Maybe what you must need is to take a walk, or just breathe more, or allow the discomfort and the feelings. Maybe what you most need is to be present with the parts of yourself that feel the angst.
 
If it feels appropriate, ask what it's trying to tell you. And again, maybe what it's most trying to tell you is just that it needs to be heard. That your feelings need to be validated in a way that they weren't validated when you were a child. Maybe parts of you simply need to be honored because they exist. All parts of you are valuable, even the parts that you would deem unworthy or as holding too much pain.
 
As you breathe into your heart, hold space for all those parts to be exactly as they are in the moment. Not trying to fix them or make them better, just letting them know that they're all lovable.
 
As I said earlier, easier said than done, but the more I've done that for myself, the more profound the changes are after allowing what is versus trying to fix myself.
 
To me, that’s the very definition of grace. Give yourself that grace as well.