The Art of Diplomacy

I see myself as being extremely diplomatic. I’ve been this way since I was a kid, preferring peaceful tactics over ego-based reactions. Even so, sometimes I have to walk away from a situation or not respond to a text or email because what I want to say is pretty harsh. I have learned never to hit send on something that I haven’t sat with overnight, or for at least a few hours, especially if I’m triggered. Because when you react immediately from a place of defense or anger, you are allowing your wounds to lead, versus coming from an empowered place. 
 
There is enough harshness and cruelty in the way people communicate, I see no reason to add to that. What do you gain by lashing out at someone? You can always choose kindness and respond rationally and calmly. This doesn’t mean that you let people walk all over you, you have strong boundaries, and you recognize when someone is triggering you, and step back before responding.
 
The same goes for if you are super busy and you quickly respond to a text just to get something out. Have you thought it through? Are you being mindful in your response? If you are too busy to put thought into it, then wait until later. 
 
The next time someone emails or texts you something that makes you reactive and want to lash out, STOP! Step away from your device. Breathe. Then write what you really want to say to vent it out. Do this in the notes app or on a piece of paper. Say every mean and awful thing you want until you are spent. Then walk away and sit with it. You may need to do this more than once. When you feel calm and rational, re-read the text/email and respond from an empowered and enlightened viewpoint, versus an emotional meltdown. It might still be strongly worded, but it will be reflective of an adult response instead of a childlike meltdown, thereby helping you stay in your power.
 
You always have a choice as to how you respond to bad behavior. Don’t sink to their level, rise above.


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