How do you see yourself in the story of your life? Are you the hero, the victim, the supporting player? How you see yourself determines everything. Your self-image has tremendous weight in your reality creation.
Notice the story you tell, look at it as if you are onstage. Are the bad guys always after you? Always knocking you down before you step out from behind the curtain? If so, you’ve given away your power and are playing the victim. Maybe you’re waiting in the wings for your chance to step onstage and shine. The problem there is that you may always be waiting for the right moment to step onto that stage and express yourself. No one will tell you to go on, there’s no stage manager; it’s up to you to take charge.
You might already be onstage, but you notice that everyone around you takes turns being the lead and you are simply supporting them. You could be hiding in back in the dressing room, too scared to even show up. Or maybe, you are center stage, claiming your spot. It is your play, and you need to be the lead in order to feel fulfilled and honor your purpose.
What is that purpose? Hard to say. It might be a very simple, and quiet story in which you truly embody the hero by learning, growing, and staying true to yourself; persevering and coming out on top. Or maybe you truly are meant to have a large audience that you inspire with your words and actions.
Either way, you are not only the lead actor, you are the author. So if the story is taking a dark turn, re-write the play! You are in charge of the script. Change the dialogue!! You have that power. Stop giving your negative ego the pen. And certainly don’t give it to your fellow cast mates; they don’t know what’s best for you. Your story, you write it. Your play, you be the lead.
Now look around and see where you are in your play and where you want to be. Here’s a clue, ultimately you want to be center stage, and not in an ego way, but in an, I choose my story, way. The spotlight is simply your willingness to be in the light. That doesn’t mean you will need to suddenly change everything. It’s an internal shift, a willingness to let the light of the Universe shine on you as you create your play. And it is so much more fun in that light.
It’s never too late to begin on Act 2 and write a new direction for yourself. Once you have the idea of you as that hero, give that image weight by feeling into it and owning it. There is tremendous power in how you see yourself, re-create a fabulous new image.
Spiritual growth does not mean that you’ll be perfect, not by a long shot. The goal isn’t perfection; it’s consciousness- in each and every interaction with yourself, and others. It’s about learning more deeply who you are, accepting both your light and your dark, and ultimately, being more of your light.
Yes, you’ll still have dark. You’re human! Helloooooo!! You are not God. You cannot save anyone nor can you be all knowing. You came here to learn and stretch and grow. Some days are going to be hard. Some days you might want to climb into bed and hide. That’s OK, go ahead and do it. Just don’t judge yourself for it and when you do it, do it fully so you can come out the other side. If you stay dark for too long, then you run the risk of wallowing in it and your negative ego will try to keep you there, versus in solution. Same for when you feel intense rage/sadness/blame etc., go into it fully and completely in order to move through to the other side.
Because it is about the other side: the light, the love, and the fun. Growth doesn’t have to be painful and hard; you can choose to move through your lessons with ease and joy. You can learn as much through the light as through the dark, it’s just that some are convinced growth needs to be difficult. It doesn’t have to be.
Focus on your light, focus on being as conscious as you can be, and do not judge, or beat yourself up, during rough times. They will pass, they always do. Love yourself through all of it. After all, the more you love yourself, all parts of yourself, the more empowered you are, and the more unstoppable you’ll be in the world.
Never underestimate the power of forgiveness to shift your reality when things are stuck. On some level, you created it, so you need to take responsibility for it. It is an illusion that “they” are doing it to you. There is no “they,” there is only you. Only you control how you act and respond in any given situation. Therefore, once you take full responsibility, the next step is forgiveness.
You can forgive yourself for why ever you allowed this person/situation in your reality, you can forgive the situation itself, and you can forgive the other person. Ultimately though, you need to be able to forgive yourself. To recognize and acknowledge why you brought this in in the first place. It’s not always necessary to know the specific whys, it could be a faulty belief, a negative thought pattern, or something stuck deep in the unconscious – the point is to truly take responsibility, and forgive yourself, for why ever you are experiencing this pain or trauma.
A brilliant way to do this is to use the Ho’oponopono. The Ho’oponopono consists of four lines:
I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you.
You say these things to yourself, while visualizing or picturing the person or situation that’s causing you stress, or you can say it to the other person.
I love you: everything starts with love. You have to start from a place of love to shift the energy, as love is the most powerful force there is.
I’m sorry: yes, forgive yourself for why this is in your reality. And genuinely feel sorry that you’ve allowed it.
Please forgive me: ask for, and be willing to receive, that forgiveness. It’s yours.
Thank you: gratitude is a powerful energy for change. Truly be grateful that the energy can now transform.
I have seen the Ho’oponopono completely transform negative situations and relationships. I use it myself regularly, and sometimes, I go into detail with it. For example, let’s say you’re having financial difficulties. You could say, “I love you self. I’m so sorry we are stuck in this pattern of struggle and lack. Please forgive me for everything keeping me in this trauma. Thank you for helping me with this.”
Or with sickness: “I love you body. I’m so sorry I keep creating this illness. Please forgive me for what I’m putting you through. Thank you.”
It is not necessary to detail it, but sometimes I like to start that way, to give my whole being a very specific message of what we are healing.
You can change up the order of the lines too, especially when wanting to shift the energy with another person. For example, while visualizing them you could say (if you were detailing it):
“Please forgive me, I have absolutely judged and blamed you. I’m so sorry for that and for your pain. Thank you for accepting my apology. I love you.”
You may be thinking, “but what if I don’t love them?!” Well, what if you don’t? Can you find the wounded part of them and accept that they aren’t perfect? That they’re doing the best they can too? That rather than sending more anger their way, love can actually heal the rift? I did this once with someone who was causing me great rage and pain. While I didn’t love their actions, I could send love to the truth of them, beyond their body. And you know what, it completely transformed our interactions. What was once acrimonious became harmonious. I didn’t stop once things started to shift, I still continue with it regularly to augment and continue the healing. After all, I allowed this person in my reality, so I can take responsibility for healing the relationship.
It starts with you. There is no one outside of you. You need to be the change. Take responsibility, and allow the forgiveness. Freedom awaits.
As we enter into this new year, this week, focus on, and remember, that you, and only you, are in charge of your happiness. You are responsible to create it, and you are responsible to expand it. Nothing outside of you will bring it to you, you must choose it, and then find ways to augment that quest.
I love this quote, it sums it up beautifully: “Life is too short to leave the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket.”
If you’ve held your happiness as being determined by another person, or a specific outcome, stop. All that will do is lead to potential disappointment. It’s not up to them; it’s up to you. You can be happy now, regardless of what is going on around you. Yes, easier said than done sometimes, but if you choose to be happy first, then the Universe will bring you more and more things to be happy about.
What makes you happy? Being in nature, dancing around the house, reading in front of the fire, or maybe doing something creative. Take a moment to ask yourself what makes you most happy, and then give yourself that thing this week. As you radiate happiness, you bring more light into the world.
My wishes for you for 2019:
I wish you clarity: to be able to focus on, and receive, the solution versus the problem.
I wish you peace: to be able to quiet your mind and know the power of being still.
I wish you laughter: to be able to find the humor in the every day versus taking things so seriously.
I wish you perspective: to be able to step back and look at a situation objectively versus making it personal.
I wish you compassion: to treat yourself, and others, with the utmost respect and care.
I wish you silliness: to allow yourself to play and have fun versus being so concerned with how others will view you.
I wish you innocence: because it is much more fun to view the world through the eyes of hope and wonder than cynicism and harshness.
I wish you creative expression: because that is the way you express the truth of your Soul.
I wish you acceptance: for you cannot change what you cannot accept.
I wish you gentleness: because you deserve to treat yourself with kindness. You are not perfect, nor will you ever be. So treat yourself gently, you will be better for it.
I wish you courage: to live a life of your design versus living the one that was set up by your family or the idea of what you thought it “should” look like.
I wish you freedom: from the limiting thoughts/beliefs/behaviors that imprison and bind you.
I wish you freedom: to soar to greater and greater levels of joy and expansion as you step into more of who you really are.
I wish you intimacy: to be able to see both the light and the dark of yourself and accept the fullness of you, thereby creating deeper levels of self-trust.
I wish you ease: because life wasn’t meant to be hardship and struggle.
I wish you magic: because the world is a lot more fun when you notice, and experience, the magical.
I wish you forgiveness: so that you can stop jailing yourself by the past and allow a brilliant and radiant future.
I wish you to know these truths about yourself (repeat as often as needed until you believe them): I matter. I am enough. I am lovable.
Here’s to a spectacular 2019!
Me, just sharing ways to make you the best you can be!