Are you doubting your abilities and if you’re good enough? You’re not alone. Doubt is the biggest killer of dreams.
Doubt will have you creating stories of fear and telling yourself why it’s better to just stay in the shadows, “Don’t put yourself out there, people might laugh or worse, ignore you.” If you’re already fearful, the idea of complete humiliation or total dismissal is enough to keep you in procrastination or avoidance. But the world does need you. It needs your insights, your perspective, and your wisdom. “Who me?” You might ask? Yes you. You reading this. Doubt can block you from speaking up at work, in a relationship, in taking action towards your dreams, or in your creative expression. No area is immune. Let’s confront your doubt, which really is an aspect of your fear… ~ Imagine a beautiful bubble of purple/violet light surrounding you to hold you in a safe space. Either close your eyes and put yourself in a calm, meditative space (obviously you’ll need to peek at the prompts below) or grab a journal to write both sides of the conversation. Invite the personification of your Doubt - or your Fear behind it - forward to speak. If you’re in a meditative space, you may see it as a version of you or as a color or shape. Be open to how it appears and don’t anticipate the outcome because it may look like a color you love. That’s a clue as to how it hides and seduces you into listening. If you're writing, let the words from Doubt/Fear flow, without editing what it's saying. Once you see it or sense it’s presence, welcome it and tell it you’d like to dialogue. It’ll only be too happy to speak. Ask it, “What’s the worst thing that could happen if I pursue X and put myself out there?” Then listen to the response, even if it’s awful. Doubt/Fear may give you a concise answer or it may have a litany of terrible scenarios. Once Doubt/Fear is done speaking, say, “I hear you, but what else could happen? What’s below what you spoke of?” Doubt/Fear may still be upset and ramble, or it’ll get quiet and whisper. Keep asking what’s below until you get to the core wound. How do you find the core wound? Here’s an example: Let’s say in the first inquiry, Doubt/Fear says you’re not smart enough and gives you details of all the ways you’ll be made fun of. When you ask, “What’s below that?” Maybe it’s fear of humiliation and judgment. What’s below that? Maybe it’s a fear of being ostracized. Below that? Fear of abandonment. Below that? Maybe the core is fear of being alone. Now for someone else, maybe the core is the humiliation, so that person doesn’t need to dig further. I've summarized these fears into easy to understand sentences, but you may have to interpret the words/feelings because it may not be so overt. Go until you feel the truth in your gut. Until you remember when you put yourself out there and something bad happened. Or maybe you saw it happen to someone else and decided you’d never put yourself in that same situation. Maybe it’s a limit one of your parents had. Regardless of whether it’s yours or another’s, find the deep root truth. Once you know your truth, then you can set about changing that belief system. Write out a quick summary of the responses you got on a blank piece of loose-leaf paper, going to the core wound. When it's complete, call your energy and power back from the list; imagine yourself getting stronger/bigger energetically. Next, if it’s tied to a specific event or person, jot down the event or person on the same piece of paper. In your mind, imagine erasing the event/events that lead to this core Doubt/Fear. Take your magic eraser and tell your subconscious that you’re erasing the negative impact from that event(s). Feel even more of your energy coming back to you in present time as you do. If there’s no event you know of, no worries, skip that part and focus on the core wound. Now, cross out everything you’ve written and write “VOID” across it in big letters. Then tear it up and either burn it or throw it away, thus showing your subconscious that you’re done with it. Once that’s complete, write the opposite of the core wound on a clean piece of paper, the new belief you choose to have instead. Using the example above, you could write, "The more I pursue X, the more love and community there is in my life." Find what new belief would excite and engage you. Maybe write it with a colored pen or on a beautiful piece of paper. Write it large! Then read it daily with feeling, until it sinks in and becomes your new reality. ~ It’s time to regain your light, your creative expression, your vision. It doesn’t have to be grand, but it does matter because it’s your desire. Our desires were given to us because we have the capability to bring them into being. They’re not there to torture us as something unattainable. So start small; gather your courage. Your courage to pursue that which could augment your life and bring you more joy- from a creative project to a promotion, to a healthier relationship. Do it for you. Because you can’t control how others will respond, but if you can imagine the pursuit of what you want to bring forth to be of infinite value, you will have good ammo to tell Doubt/Fear, “Not today, thank you.” Then show Doubt/Fear the door.
4 Comments
Mina
5/18/2022 08:00:04 am
Were you in my head this week?? 😂
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Kallie K.
5/18/2022 09:36:40 am
The timing… 🤯
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Kelly
5/19/2022 12:58:16 pm
Thanks, Tina! I'm going to share this with my niece!
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Halle
5/25/2022 10:30:23 pm
I love this blog! What I think is particularly unique is that you encourage us to do this for ourselves. I read tons of stuff and never hear that perspective. It's also so service oriented. But you're giving permission to serve ourselves!! And you're teaching us that by serving ourselves, we serve the world. How cool is that?
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