Freedom from the Past, by Staying in the Present
Typically, I like to understand why I’m feeling the way I am such as, “Why am I in a bad mood? What got triggered? Where does this feeling come from?”
But part of what I've been working on, is how to simply be with whatever is occurring, without diving into the details. Staying in my body, rather than spinning in mental thoughts.
That can be difficult. But I also realize that it’s a hook. Needing to know and understand hooks me back into the story or the wound or the emotional trauma that’s surfacing, thus taking me out of the present moment. It’s a way to think the emotion, versus feel it.
I had to put this into play when I unexpectedly felt intense anger the other night. It was so out of the blue and had nothing to do with what was going on. I knew that an old wound must have inadvertently gotten opened because it felt so out of present time. All I could do was be with it.
-First, I made sure to be responsible with my anger, which meant going somewhere private, so I didn’t negatively impact those around me. I acknowledged, allowed, and felt the anger fully, without judgment.
-Then I grounded myself in present time. I also stated my name, the date, and the time out loud, which is an easy way to pull yourself into the now.
-Finally, I sent myself love. I loved myself even though I was triggered. I loved all the parts of me that were clearly upset. I opened my heart for self-compassion and kept bringing myself into the present moment, while acknowledging that I was safe.
The more I did that, the calmer I got, and the more the emotion dissipated.
I still don't know what triggered the anger, and I consciously chose not to “figure it out.” I've been working to neutralize old pain, versus stir it back up by reiterating an old story. It has no bearing on my present unless I allow it to, nor is it something I want to continue creating in my future. Therefore, releasing the layers as they surface, and choosing to experience more peace instead.
Remember, your power lies in your body, in present time. Not in the mental spin. Be free of the past by staying in the present.