I was listening to a discussion recently, and the sound healer I sometimes quote, Eileen McKusick, pointed out something that some of us know, but maybe hadn’t really thought about. There’s a phrasing in the romance languages where you have something versus be it. For example, “I am having hunger,” instead of, "I am hungry." Taking that premise, what would happen if we applied that principle to our emotions?
The wording, “I am” is an incredibly strong and powerful statement that we throw around all the time. When we use it, we claim ownership of whatever follows. Which is why you should be judicious with your words and thoughts. Now to the topic at hand: when you're feeling an emotion, instead of claiming it with an “I am,” what if you shift your thinking and you have it instead? Having something is temporary and transitory; it can pass through you quickly. Owning something is harder to shed and makes it more ingrained.
Here’s an example: I woke up in a mood recently and found myself saying, “I am so crabby!” Then I started looking for the reasons why I was so crabby. As I was doing that, I realized I was beginning to create a story about the crabbiness, as well as an association – i.e., it was the food I ate or it must be a certain supplement, etc. Now maybe neither of those were the case and yet I was about to tell myself a whole story with negative associations and dig that crabbiness in even further.
Thankfully I caught myself and with a swift, “cancel clear!”- my favorite way of deleting whatever negative thought I say/think- I decided to shift my experience. I started by saying, “I am having crabbiness.” I repeated it a few times. What that did first of all, was help me to acknowledge the crabbiness with nothing attached to it. It was simply what I was experiencing in that moment. A temporary feeling that I accepted and let myself express. The more I owned it as a temporary state, the more it began to dissipate.
Every time I wanted to blame something or someone for my mood, I pulled myself out of victim, took my power back, and simply stated again that I was having the crabbiness. Without attachment.
The next step was to choose what I wanted instead; remember the power of choice. I chose to feel calm and at peace.
As I continued to do this, eventually, the crabbiness completely disappeared. This wasn’t immediate, nor did I feel completely calm right away, but I kept choosing it and I kept releasing waves of crabbiness when they would come up. Acknowledge, and release.
I also had to remind myself who was in charge in my reality: my conscious aware self, or my emotions. I chose my conscious aware self.
Now listen, all that being said, sometimes you’re straight up angry or sad for a very specific reason and you need to process that. In those cases, allow yourself to feel the emotion fully and vent everything going on in a responsible way, so that ultimately you can release the pain below the emotion. (See previous blogs on emotional healing)
Why I write a lot about things like this, is because I want you to be more empowered throughout your day, not just when you’re sitting down to ground yourself. I want you to feel like you have the power to shift whatever is going on in your reality, because you do!
So, if it appeals to you, play with this concept this week. Allow anything negative to be fleeting, so that you can focus on and create, more of what you desire.
Me, Tina Germain, just sharing ways to make you the best you can be!